Did someone you love dearly just cheat on you? Now you are out of words, you cannot seem to verbalize your feelings appropriately. This is where I come in. I will give you all the things to say to your boyfriend when he cheats on you.
These things are guaranteed to get all the pain of your chest. Heartbreak can leave a person disorientated. You may think you do not even want to speak to him. But experts recommend that you actually get all the pain off your chest and resolve the reasons behind his cheating.
It is said that if you know better you do better. Once you know the real reason why he chose to cheat you can begin a journey to either forgiving him or moving on with your life. That all depends on you.
“You hurt me”
Expecting women to grin and bare their man having an affair is a thing of the past. This cannot happen in the world we live in today with so many sexually transmitted diseases threatening our lives.
In the past the woman was to blame for a man having an affair on her. They would say that she is not satisfying her man hence he goes out looking for stimulation outside.
It goes without saying that these attitudes are discriminatory and they propel toxic masculinity. You do not need to bow down to these beliefs anymore and you should be encouraged to fight for your human dignity.
One way of doing this is by making sure that he hears your voice. You are not in an arranged marriage; you chose to be with this person on condition that he treats you well.
Therefore you need to talk to this fellow when he is not living up to your expectations through ills such as cheating.
One thing to say to your boyfriend when he cheats on you is to tell him that he hurt you. You need to be honest. Be honest with yourself and your boyfriend. Do not pretend like you can handle things you cannot.
“What really happened?”
I believe that its best to know what really happened before making a decision. Knowing the truth will give you a better perspective. However, this is not an easy thing to request and accept when it happens.
If you feel that ignorance is bliss then do not apply this step. But if you know and trust that you can look at the situation through a mature perspective then one thing to say to your boyfriend when he cheats on you is to ask what really happened.
If you choose to be in the dark about the affair you need to be okay with this forever. This is because once you catch him out you need to ask then and then what he did, not months after you forgive him.
Another thing you need to consider is the type of person you are. Don’t just take my advice without applying it to your personality. I know I am a very paranoid person, so if I do not get all the facts straight I will assume bits and pieces myself.
What is wrong about this is that those bits and pieces are normally not the way things happened leading to arguments over fiction. So if you are like me it is best to be brave enough to hear everything that happened from a regretful boyfriend.
“Did this happen because something is missing?”
To be honest, the first thing that runs through your mind is the many things you assume you did wrong for your man to be running into the arms of another woman.
You have to tell yourself that you are not to blame for his behavior. Blaming yourself for somebody’s behavior is pointless. Remember that if he is not happy in his relationship he was suppose to get out of it instead of cheating on you.
However, it is possible that he is not happy in the relationship and cheating is his way of getting out. Then once you find out and he apologizes and shows you his keen interest to keep trying for the relationship, one thing to say to your boyfriend when he cheats on you is “did this happen because something is missing.
It is possible that he is cheating because something is missing. But I need you to understand that it is possible for a man to cheat even though he has everything he needs.
After all, mistakes are made and people are greedy by nature.
With that said it will be beneficial for the recovery of your relationship if the two of you discuss areas where both of you are not meeting each other halfway. Your man will tell you what he wishes you would do but you can also use this time to tell him what you would like.
“What are you going to do to regain my trust?”
Do not take the entire responsibility of repairing the relationship. The two of you need to make equal efforts toward saving your relationship. One thing to say to your boyfriend when he cheats on you is “what are you going to do to regain my trust?”
This need not seem controlling; you need to tell him that you want to know the efforts he will take to repair the relationship, that way when he stops making these efforts you will know that he has slacked in trying to repair the relationship.
In the end, if everything is tried and there is still too much that cannot be healed it is safe to say it’s over. Remember that things do not always work out the way we had planned.
So if you know that the two of you have tried immensely to heal the relationship but too much trust has been broken then it will good for the two of you to part ways.
This way you can start afresh with new people incorporating the lessons you learned in the previous relationship to your new relationship.
My name is Tabs Thabsile I am the Head of Marketing at Lonely Tear. Also I am a freelance writer who is finally starting to find success doing my dream job. Writing is my passion. I am lucky enough to be able to combine many of my favorite things, writing, parenting, gaming, and sci-fi. I am open to writing about anything and will do the research to make sure I am writing accurately and factually about any topic.