Taking a break from a relationship can allow you to actualize many things that you might not observe during the time you spend with your companion.
So many couples think a healthy relationship means being together all the time, but that’s not true.Spector
If your goal is not to end your relationship. But you want to figure out what is right or wrong in your relationship. Staying apart from your partner for some reasonable time is healthy for you.
Taking a break is healthy because when you get back, your feelings for each other will be fresh, and you’ll start a new chapter.
So you need to know whether taking a break is going to be useful, and it will help fix what is not going right in your relationship.
What is a break from a relationship?
A break from a relationship is when a couple takes time from each other when they have some issues that need their immediate attention.
After solving everything, the couple may choose to stay together or break up for good.
A couple might not interact more often or see each other for a certain period. However, the two people are not dating other people as they are still connected.
“Many couples get back together again,” confirms Kristin Davin, a New York City psychologist. All this depends on how the two love birds lay out the guidelines for their break.
Are you curious about taking a break from your relationship? Here’s how you can do it;
1. Ascertain why you need a break
Are you feeling your relationship is lacking something? Is it affection, time, communication, the difference in goals and values, etc.?
Once you determine why you are failing your relationship, you might have to talk to your partner so that the two of you take a break and figure out how you can solve such issues.
The point is to see whether your difference is a deal-breaker because you might not need just a break but a breakup, especially when the issues are unsolvable. So be sure of this so that you are sure when you take a break from your relationship.
2. Discuss the break with your spouse
When you want to take a break from a relationship, it’s better to talk to your partner in person, and it should be a one on one.
Meeting someone makes it easy because you will get to see their expression and understand what they have to say quickly.
The decision for the break involves two of you; hence the discussion should do too. Doing this will help you get to a consensus.
3. Set a realistic timeframe.
If you and your partner agree to take a break from your relationship, you need to decide which time frame should be sensible.
Let the time not be too short or very long so that no party is affected. A short time will affect one to figure out what they are deciding, and a long time might be a long-drawn for your partner to make the final decision.
So the time limit should not be the one that will bring frustrations or pressure onto one party.
4. Let the time apart count.
If you choose to break from a relationship, you need to touch through and see the gap is relevant for you and your partner. Get to understand yourself more while away from your companion. It will help you realize a lot that you might have been missing while with your partner.
If you feel happier and better while alone and apart from your relationship, it might indicate your ties with your spouse are not very important.
If you miss your spouse very much, maybe you can’t live without them, and they are the missing piece of your life. So the break will help you understand yourself more.
5. Set some boundaries
To avoid mixing things up, you need to set boundaries for the two of you. Whether little or no contact at all. Perhaps you need to meet occasionally to see a therapist, or if you have children, your partner might need to see them.
Doing all this will help you avoid having high expectations from your spouse or the reverse hence having your break smooth.
6. Decide what you will do during the break.
It is wise to decide on things you will do and will not do while apart during a relationship break. Will you discuss what each one of you has been doing during their alone time?
If you want to date or see someone for the time being, is your partner okay with it, or you both have to be faithful to each other until you get back together or decide to call it quits?
7. Have reasonable expectations.
Some needs may not be appropriate for you to expect from your companion. If you have high expectations from your partner and you can see they are struggling to fulfill those needs.
You might have to reconsider those expectations. Maybe they are far away from their reach. So when you take a break from that relationship, you have to look closely and restructure yourself to what your partner can manage.
8. Decide whether you want to inform the kids or not.
When you are going to take a break from a relationship and have children above 10year, it’s crucial to involve them. Let them know you are taking some time apart from their dad or mom.
If you do this, the kids will be psychologically ready for the family break. However, it’s up to you to share with anyone or to keep your holiday private.
What to expect during a break from a relationship?
When you choose to go in for a break with your partner, you might have to consider a few things to make your time apart from your partner a little more exciting and constructive at the same time.
You have to start looking forward to things you may not have embarked on before and take them on. Don’t sit there alone to cause loneliness or feelings of missing your companion; keep active so that you have self-realization during that time.
You are indeed going to miss your other half, but what else do you do at this point? You can only embrace reality and see through how better you turn your life and your relationship.
A few things you can do during a break from a relationship;
1. Reconnect with your family and friends.
You have to know that now more than ever; you have all the time in the world to catch up with important people in your life. Use your free time to bond with your parents, siblings, and your buddies.
Visit them regularly or have a girls’ night out so that you erase any anger and loneliness while isolating yourself without connecting with people.
Doing this will help you feel better each day as you will get to see how much support your people will give you during your trying times.
2. Learn something new
Now that you are taking a break in your relationship, you might have to consider engaging in an activity that may add value to you. You can join dance classes, cooking classes, go for Yoga, or learn a new language.
You do this to prove to your partner that you can become a better person and are willing to do anything to spice up your relationship after the break.
3. Concentrate on yourself
While you take a break, you need to expect many bad feelings that might sometimes put you down. However, to avoid any negative feelings onto yourself, put in more time to become a better person.
If it means going to the gym for body goals, giving yourself a makeover, working hard at your job, making your business better, then do it. Here you will be sure you are not a failure in any way and that you can win the situation no matter what comes your way.
4. Avoid contacting your partner
If you and your partner have decided to take a break, it would be best to keep giving them space instead of texting or calling.
Give your partner time to process everything and figure out what they want for the relationship.
Find someone else to talk to if you feel lonely to bridge that gap of missing your loved one.
Taking a break in a relationship rules
Five rules of taking a break in a relationship;
1. Choose an end date
When taking a break in a relationship, you need to sit and decide which day you will come back to discuss the way forward for your relationship.
By doing this, you address cutting short your break while one of you doesn’t know when they can see you, or coming back to you shortly after the break begging you to go back.
2.Set ground rules for the break
As you take your break in a relationship, you need to agree on how you will stay while apart. If you decide on dating or not, how often you can communicate or choose no contact rule.
3. Listen to your inner voice
If you are taking a break and your gut feeling is warning you about the relationship, don’t force it.
Once you start developing feelings of doubting whether you can continue your relationship after the break, you need to pay attention. It could be a warning that after the break, you might have to end the relationship.
4. Note down every moment while apart
Writing down what you feel while taking a break in a relationship is very healthy. You are free to have a diary so that you take note of every moment you think is memorable even when you are apart.
By doing this, you get to understand your feelings, whether you miss your companion that much. You might also feel the two can not be together again, even after the break’s end date.
5. Enjoy your apart time
You are taking a break from a relationship so that you get to do things you could have missed while you were with your partner. While away from your companion, use this time to enjoy with your friends, have fun, and clear your head.
You can have visits to your parents or siblings so that you catch up with them and also keep your mind active. Don’t stay alone to give room for loneliness to occur to you.
There might be no specific rules for taking a break in a relationship. Still, it’s you to determine how peaceful and meaningful your holiday can be.
If you need to have a successful break in a relationship, have your ground rules which you and your partner should follow and ensure both parties agree to everything.
Taking a break in a relationship quotes
1. “Let there be spaces in your togetherness.”Khalin Gibran
2. Sometimes, you need a break, in a beautiful place, alone to figure out everything.
3. I am taking a break but not a massive gap because the maiden record is happening now, and I am recording it as we speak, we are not right as we speak, but we are close.”Bruce Dickinson
4. “When two hearts are for each other, no distance in a relationship is too far, no time is too long, and no other love can break them apart.” Unknown
5. ” Love is the most problematic habit to break and the most difficult to satisfy.”Drew Barrymore
A break shouldn’t go beyond a month so that you can have good results out of it. Maybe a few weeks can be okay, depending on the decision you and your significant other decide so that you can figure out what’s best for both of you.
Taking a break in a relationship works for many couples because it clarifies any doubts they might have and recreates the spark for their relationship. It’s like restarting something; it gets to feel fresh again.
Taking a break means you are putting your relationship on pause to take care of your differences within the set period.
At the end of the time frame set, you can choose whether you are breaking up or resuming your relationship depending on the break’s outcomes. So it’s entirely up to the both of you to follow your hearts.
Your partner might ask for a break because there are some challenges in your relationship, and they do not want to give up on you or break up with you. Your partner needs some time apart to clear any doubts and reaffirm if they wish to be with you or not.
You can take a break when you live together by merely taking time off to explore more about yourself.
Use your free time to visit your family and friends. You can start engaging in a hobby, clear your head and think through your differences.
Taking a break is healthy for your relationship. Once you realize there are many differences between you and your spouse.
If you agree on taking some time apart, you will come back fresh and ready to start over with your relationship.
Founder and CEO of Lonely Tear. Enjoys Writing. Mountain Climbing and Traveling.